Daikirai Sakura
by LYKAchan
Summary: I hate sakuras. You are not a cherry blossom." An unexpectedly sweet and sappy one-shot conversation by the riverside. S S believe me.


Lchan: A one-shot...; Heh. Well, I just edited this a bit and reposted it. It's got the same weird idea, same characters, same settings, just a bit better with the language and presentation… OOC alert! They're already a couple here, so try not to be too surprised when they act more affectionately towards each other. I do still try to maintain their personalities. Please not that, here, they're not 10-year-olds anymore. Maybe they're in college or something; I'm not sure. In any case, I'd appreciate a review! No flames, please! Enjoy! Luv ya, people!

Daikirai Sakura

"It's strange..."

Sakura raised her head at the cool voice that fractured the quiet. "Hoe...?" she whispered. "What was that, Syaoran-kun?" She waited expectantly for a few moments for his reply, but the silence remained pregnant. "Syaoran-kun…?" she coaxed, quietly.

She had lasted in his silent but reassuring company for close to thirty minutes now, without a single word spoken between them, not a touch of hands or an exchange of smiles. Consequently, she'd had plenty of time to think back on everything they had gone through that led to this perfect moment.

Under the lazy, afternoon sun, the two of them were sitting together on an empty stretch of meadow by the riverbank, hanging out beneath the protective overhangs of sakura trees, listening to the steady rhythm of water burbling against stones. Delicate pink petals lingered in the air, dancing to the tune of the whispering wind. The sky was a vast expanse of pale blue, barely blemished by blurring wisps of cirrus and the occasional cumulus. The atmosphere was cool and placid...a crime to destroy.

Syaoran's speaking to her so suddenly brought her crashing back to reality, jolting her from her recollections and thoughts.

Now, she regarded him with a slight, curious knitting of her eyebrows, wondering why he still hesitated to answer. In the gentle glow of the afternoon sun, his features seemed more pensive than usual.

"It's strange..." he repeated, his tones an unobtrusive caress, humbly pitched yet intense with gravity.

"What's strange, Syaoran-kun?" Sakura prodded, her head tilting to the side.

She wished he would raise those shaded amber eyes. It was never easy to read them, even now that they were together, yet it would comfort her if he would just spare her a glance. But his gaze remained steadily--maddeningly--downcast. Sakura knew it would be a mistake to think he wasn't attuned to everything else that happened around him, but it WAS easy to be fooled.

Syaoran raised his hand into the air and caught a delicate pink cherry petal between his fingers. He gazed at it for several long seconds, absorbing every pixel of its timid simplicity.

Sakura held to her patience and waited.

Finally, Syaoran raised his chocolate-brown eyes from the remnant of a beautiful flower and looked at her. Beneath the unruly play of his brown hair, his eyes were somber. Not cold, though, which was a consolation...

"Your name," he said. "It..."

"It...what?" Sakura tried to retain his gaze, but his eyes slipped from hers.

"It doesn't suit you," he muttered. His voice hardened. "You're NOT a cherry blossom." He sounded almost angry, and he DID look angry when he flicked the petal aside with a hateful grumble of "che." Then, after a minute...

"I hate sakuras."

At those words, something inside Sakura shattered. Pained confusion surged through her senses. She didn't move, couldn't move, unsure of what to do. Tears welled hot and moist in her wide, emerald eyes. Syaoran's gaze neither shifted nor softened.

Sakura couldn't understand. She loved her name. She was proud of it. How many people have told her how alike she was with the flower? How many have commented on much it matched her personality...her beauty...? Why was Syaoran telling her this?

"You're different," Syaoran repeated, to deepen her shock--to deepen the hurt. "You're not like it at all. It's a pretty enough name and it IS fine as a name...but JUST a name. Besides being something to call you with, I don't like the way it erases your personality."

And the tears did fall then.

Why? WHY? She couldn't imagine what could make him say those things to her! Was she really so ugly? Was she not graceful enough? Did he think she was a graceless klutz who has lost touch with the dancing world? Perhaps she was too much of a wild-child? Or perhaps he thought she was just a skinny little git unworthy to be compared to such delicate beauty?

Or was he...was he...dropping hints...of BREAKING UP with her?

Sheer, intense hurt gripped her whole being. She stared at Syaoran in utter bewilderment, tears uncontrollably cascading down her face. He caught another petal from midair, glared the same scornful daggers at it, and hid it from view by folding his fingers and crushing it underneath his fist.

Sakura couldn't take it anymore. "WHY?" she cried, her voice rising. "Why, Syaoran-kun? What do you MEAN?"

He stared at her then, deep brown eyes unfathomable. He never did disclose any real emotion through his eyes other than anger and fierce determination...or, that is...none other that she knew of.

"Sakura..." he said, watching her as she crushed her lower lip in confusion, fighting back another outburst. A strange tint of desperation seeped into her features as she waited for him to explain...

He was offending her.

"Listen. Your beauty...is not comparable to it..." he started. Sakura blanched visibly. "You might be alike at some points, but I think a personality like yours could be compared better to another flower that's NOT a sakura."

Sakura's heart slowly started to crack at what she feared was the slow confirmation of her fears. What was he saying? Why was he saying it this way? Why now?

"THIS..." he raised the single petal "...is not even HALF of what you are!"

"Hoe?" This time, she was really just confused. Her brows knitted together.

"But...Syaoran-kun...that's just a petal. I mean...my mother named me after the flower itself..."

Syaoran's solemnity faltered for a moment before he recovered. He threw the single pink petal into the air and let it sail over a few meters of grass before falling out of sight between the long green wisps of growing weeds.

Then he faced her again, amber eyes looking deeply, oppressively into moist emerald pools...

And he spoke, gaze never letting go of hers...

"You might be as gentle and as innocent-looking as it is, but that's the end of that.

"A sakura is frail, easily ripped, torn, or twisted into shreds. You stand in complete faith to your own beliefs, never swayed by others' opinions. It flows with the wind, but you go where you want to and do what you think is right, even when the rest is going in the opposite direction. You change people's lives, yet you also alter your own personality for the better...not like a fragile-looking petal--changing into something to which others drive it to. It can't resist when it is torn or shredded, but nothing can break your spirit, Sakura.

"It is weak, while you are strong and hardcore; courageous, but pure, your innocence unblemished--enviable. In truth, that part might be one of your few similarities to a sakura flower...but that's it. Its beauty is simple, but when it stands alone, it's nothing special or spectacular. You...you are exquisite BECAUSE you can stand alone and still be beautiful. It looks frail and wispy. You are full of life and energy and charm.

"A cherry blossom can make people happy because it LOOKS beautiful, but as a name for a girl like you, it underrates your capacity to be beautiful both inside and out. That blossom will wilt into crinkly yellowish scrap, leaving every hint of youthful beauty in the past...but you will never lose your infectious, infinite appetite for life. You have and will always remain as cheerful and grateful as you are--stage to stage, childhood to adulthood and past that--even when you can so clearly see the world's countless sufferings.

"A sakura dwells in full capacity of its beauty only in the spring, but nothing daunts YOUR liveliness and ever-existing cheer. It doesn't have the power to make a difference. It captures an audience when in a bunch, but, alone, it is forgotten after only a second's glance. It is just like the rest of its kind when with its kind or even without. You, on the other hand, could capture an audience and hold their attention. Even when you separate ways, they never forget you. You have the ability to make people love you even without trying...

"Sakura petals look delicate and fragile. Without the backup of other petals, it looks weak. But you are blessed with color and vibrancy, Sakura, showing courage and bravery even when nobody's helping you...and your friends and family make you stronger and braver still..."

He paused.

"Don't be mad at me, please, Sakura...I just...It's just that I hate what it makes people think of you. I hate it for making them not see that are more than a pretty face with a pretty name. I...I know what I'm saying might hurt you...but you have to understand...I..." He broke off when he saw she still hadn't stopped crying.

"Sakura...listen to me..." Syaoran murmured. "...No matter what name you could've been named...I still and always will love you... All those things I made you listen to...all those descriptions that might have offended you...all the words I've said that could have caused your tears...

"Those make me love you more than I ever imagined I could."

Silence followed the closing of Syaoran's heartfelt speech. Sakura could hardly see him beyond the blur of her joyous tears. His words meant more to her than anything he had ever told her before, more than everything he had ever spoken merged. This was beyond what she thought of the depth of his feelings.

"Syaoran..." she whispered, in a voice slightly broken by the rush of emotions that still ran through her whole body. Clueless of what to say, she lowered her eyes and shook her head slowly. "Don't frown. I'm not mad."

Syaoran's face broke into a relieved grin. "I'm glad," he said. "I started to think I would never forgive myself--"

"Don't think that." She smiled, and she was joy incarnate. "Everything that you said tells me I will never regret loving you this much, Syaoran-kun. And though I could never put into proper words these feelings that I have for you, you should rest well knowing that I love you very much anyway."

Syaoran stared at her, stunned somewhat. Red seeped into his cheeks. Then, a few silent moments later, he laughed, struggling to evade the embarrassment of being caught at his shyest. "Okay. Whatever, Kinomoto."

"Hoe?" Her emerald eyes widened at him, surprised at the transformation.

"Yeah, we should stop the sugar rush. I've always known how deeply your feelings for me ran--ever since you confessed!--but then, I figured I kept mine too much from showing. I know just how DENSE you are!" He tossed her a playfully cocky look. "You didn't HAVE to compliment me back."

Sakura pouted, before bursting into giggles. "Well, you're right!" she said. "But I never knew you have a flair for poetry!"

"I don't." Syaoran smirked. "I was just telling you how much your name is the opposite of who you are. I didn't ask for you to emote."

"Well, you're a very observant boy..."

"It took me thirty minutes to think all that out..."

He grinned. She giggled. And they lapsed back into comfortable silence.

They did not reach for each other's hands. Neither did they crave for any contact. They knew what they had, and that was all that mattered. Everything was perfect, and the day couldn't possibly get better.

"Arigato, Syaoran-kun..."

Syaoran smiled. "You were worth the effort."

"Do you know how much I love you?"

He smirked again, to hide the rising blush. "I thought I made it clear you don't have to do any more convincing. I'm warning you...we don't have an insulin injection at the apartment...if you keep this up, I could get hurt."

"So do you know?" Sakura pressed, her smile ever widening.

"I told you. Ever since you told me."

"Good." She flopped back down on the grass.

The sun began to sink in the horizon.

Eventually, Syaoran stood up. He offered his hand to her and he pulled her to her feet. He did not let go. "Let's go home. I'll walk you," he said.

Sakura smiled and nodded happily. "Arigato," she said.

Amber met emerald again and locked for several moments. Both grinning blissfully, they walked back to civilization hand in hand.

"Aishiteru, Syaoran-kun..."

"Yeah. Likewise, Sakura...aishiteru..."

"And by the way, Syaoran-kun...you're cuter than a wolf."

Syaoran smirked. "Nice try."

owari

Lchan: Hope you enjoyed! Now, click that button and REVIEW! Thanks, peepz!


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